Black Horse Read online

  Turning around slowly, Meadow hung her head down and drew in a defeated sigh. She did not notice the man who had just emerged from the bushes.

  “I’m here,” Black Horse said quietly as he approached her from behind.

  A startled gasp escaped from Meadow as she twirled around to face him. He had removed his feathered headdress and ceremonial shirt. His bare chest was a shimmering shade of dark bronze in the moonlight, and his leggings and breechcloth hung low on his narrow hips. He had released his long hair from the tight braids, and now the thick raven tresses framed his handsome face and tumbled down over his shoulders. A wide tribal armband of black and gold encircled one of his upper arms.

  “I—I was looking for you.” Meadow met his unwavering gaze and felt the breath catch for a moment in her throat as she waited for him to speak again. From the strange expression on his face, she wondered if he somehow blamed her for the trouble with the Mounties. Before he finally spoke again, Meadow felt as if she had died a thousand deaths.

  “It is not safe for you to be in the forest alone, especially at night,” Black Horse said in a formal tone. His gazed traveled up and down her entire body.

  “I don’t care,” she retorted, not caring that he was looking at her as if he could see right through her clothes. “Tonight is supposed to be my wedding night—remember?” She paused and waited for him to respond. His only reaction was to continue to stare at her in a way that left her feeling completely naked.

  “Why did you run away today?” she asked in a tone edged with the hurt and disappointment she could no longer hide.

  “I have never run away from anything or anyone in my life!”

  He stepped closer, and although Meadow was tempted, she did not back away from him.

  “You ran away today,” she repeated. She forced herself to remain unmoving, even though his obvious rage made her tremble inwardly like a frightened rabbit. Even in the dim moonlight, she could see the way her words affected him. She raised her head up in a defiant manner that belied the nervousness she felt inside and clutched the blanket even tighter, as if it would somehow protect her from his wrath.

  Black Horse had never known a woman who would confront him in this manner, and even in his fury, he was impressed that she would not back down. He would not, however, allow her to accuse him of running away. He had merely sought refuge down here by the river while he tried to sort through his troubled thoughts. In spite of his growing love for her, the Mountie’s outburst had made Black Horse’s doubts about their wedding resurface.

  Although he had heard many stories in the past few days about how Meadow had come to live with the Sioux, and he could see for himself that she was more than content to be living with his people, Black Horse still could not ignore the fact that the Mountie had blatantly pointed out: she was white. Even Walks Tall had hinted to him in the beginning that his marriage to a woman who was not Sioux could be a mistake. What worried Black Horse even more was knowing that, once he claimed her as his woman, his love and devotion to her would never allow him to give her up again, especially if she bore him any children. He drew in a ragged sigh. What if they did have children and she someday decided to return to her own people? Would she try to take his children with her?

  An odd sense of fear filled Black Horse, a feeling he did not know how to acknowledge. He had trained himself to feel hatred toward the wasichu—whites—but he had never feared them. This woman made him fear that he would let himself love her even more than he already did, and then he would lose her.

  Black Horse stared down at her. Words eluded him, and emotions he had never known left him feeling vulnerable and defenseless. He had sensed a joining of his soul with this woman’s from the first moment he had looked into her unforgettable green eyes, and the feeling was growing stronger with each passing second. A defeated sigh escaped from his parted lips. He shook with the realization that he was falling so completely in love with her that nothing else mattered. He cleared his throat loudly, but could not clear his confused thoughts.

  “Why were you looking for me to night?” Black Horse asked. His voice had dropped to barely more than a whisper now, and he trembled as he waited for her reply.

  Meadow drew in a quivering breath as she stared up at his face. “I—I came because…” Her mind groped for the right words to express the way she felt at this moment. “Because I cannot imagine waking up to another sunrise if I am not in your arms. I want nothing more than to be your wife and spend the rest of my life with you,” she said in a shaky voice.

  Black Horse remained silent and unmoving as though he was contemplating her words. His eyes never left her face as he said, “You must know that to be my woman—my wife—in every way means that you will have to deny your true heritage for as long as we are together, for as long as we live.”

  “I have proven my loyalty to the Sioux,” Meadow retorted. “White Buffalo has never kept me here against my will.”

  “When the last of the Sioux are dying of starvation and there is nowhere else to hide, will you still be so loyal?”

  The meaning of his question cut deep into Meadow’s pride. It pained her to think that he doubted her devotion to the Sioux in any way. She had never once considered returning to the whites if life here became too difficult. Somehow, she had to make Black Horse realize her true feelings if they were going to have a future together.

  “I have not forgotten that the Sioux killed my white family,” Meadow said with a slight quiver in her voice. “But I have also seen what the wasichu have done to the Indians. And like you,” she continued with a forceful tone as she brought her fist to her chest, “I will die for my people.” Her stance straightened in a proud manner as she added, “And the Sioux are my people now and forever!”

  He stared at her in silence for a moment. “As my woman,” he said in a hoarse voice, “you will have to understand that there are things that I must do.”

  “As your woman, I would make it my duty to understand and support whatever it is that you must do.” She imagined that he was referring to the raids that he had been conducting down in Montana on the ranchers’ and the American soldiers’ livestock and supplies. The thought of him leaving her for these dangerous escapades was not something she looked forward to, but she knew he would expect her to accept that this was his way of helping his people.

  “It’s more than killing the white man’s cattle or stealing his whiskey,” he said, as if he could read her thoughts. He added more forcefully, “I am not ready to admit defeat against the wasichu.”

  As his meaning became evident, a worried gasp escaped from Meadow. “But Sitting Bull has said that there is to be no more fighting with the whites.”

  Black Horse dropped his head down and stared at the ground. “I understand why Sitting Bull and the other chiefs have brought our people here to Canada. The old ones and the women and children are weak, and too tired to fight anymore.” His head rose up as he looked at her again. “But I will never understand their decision to give up completely.” Black Horse shook his head slowly. His voice was low and determined when he added, “I will never stop fighting for my people and the land that is rightfully ours. Never!”

  An icy chill whipped through Meadow. She knew Black Horse meant every word he said, and she had no doubts that he was prepared to face the consequences. If he went against Sitting Bull’s orders, he could be cast out of the tribe, and she along with him, if they were married.

  Letting his words settle in her mind, Meadow turned away from him and stared out at the calm waters of the river. Life here could be so peaceful and easy if the Canadians would allow them to stay. But she knew that would not happen. When they were forced to return to the other side of the border, they would undoubtedly encounter the same hatred they had run away from in the first place. Meadow exhaled a burdened sigh as she tried to imagine what the future might hold for the Sioux, or even if they would have a future at all.

  “Do you think you are strong enough—br
ave enough—to be the woman of a war chief?” he asked as he moved up behind her.

  She was much smaller than he was, and he could almost rest his chin on the top of her head. Meadow could feel his breath touch lightly against her hair. She yearned for his arms to encircle her, to turn her around, and for him to kiss her until her lips begged for mercy. But he was waiting to hear her say the words that would tell him that she truly understood what he must do, and that nothing—or no one—could stop him.

  Her buttocks were brushing against his thigh, and her knees felt almost too wobbly to hold her weight. Still, the thought of him leaving her to go into another battle with the whites dominated her thoughts. She heard him draw in a heavy breath. When he exhaled, the warmth of his breath engulfed her. She could feel the heat radiating from his body and infusing every inch of her own body with a raging wildfire. But there was so much more involved here than the immense physical attraction they felt for each other.

  She recalled a discussion she’d had with White Buffalo earlier that day, when he had paid her a visit shortly before the wedding ceremony. He had told her how proud he was to have her as his daughter. As he often did, he spoke of the hardships and pain their people had suffered, of how uncertain every day of their lives was, and of how important it was for them to live each day as if there might never be another tomorrow.

  White Buffalo also explained why he wanted her to marry Black Horse, and he had asked her to forgive him for his selfishness for wanting her to stay with the Sioux forever. As she thought about the conversation she had had with White Buffalo, her thoughts kept wandering to the handsome man who stood so close, and to the question he had just asked her: are you strong enough and brave enough to be the wife of a war chief? She wondered why she hesitated so long in answering. There was only one choice she could make. “Sha,” she answered as she turned to face her warrior. “You give me the courage and the strength to face anything, as long as I know that you are at my side. I love you, Black Horse, and nothing else matters.”

  For a few seconds he seemed too surprised by her admission to make another move. When his instincts took over, though, he clasped her by the shoulders and pulled her toward him. Her head tilted back and her gaze met his for just an instant before his mouth descended on her waiting mouth. Meadow’s response to his kiss was immediate. Letting him pull her tighter into his embrace, Meadow allowed her passion for this man rule all of her actions. The strict customs of their people did not enter her mind, nor would she permit them to interfere with the plans for to night. In her mind, and in her heart, she would become his woman with or without the completion of a wedding ceremony. The white blanket fell into a crumpled heap at their feet.

  Instinctively, Meadow’s arms slid up to encircle his neck. She did not resist when he crushed her body against his. The way he kissed her now was completely different from the tender kisses they had shared before, and as his mouth seemed to devour hers, she mimicked his actions with exuberance. When his tongue slipped into her mouth, she was unsure how to react, but after it began to tease and entwine with hers, she discovered she was enjoying this strange new game. She was not hesitant to let Black Horse teach her the ways of love, and she eagerly let her own tongue begin to taunt his as they continued the wet, heated kiss.

  Though his kisses caused the most wondrous sensations to erupt throughout her body, they were almost forgotten when Meadow felt his hands moving down to her waist and then along the curve of her hips. She gasped inwardly when she realized he had grabbed onto the fringe on the bottom of her dress, and was now raising the garment past her thighs. She wore nothing under her wedding dress, and his large hands eagerly clutched at her bare buttocks. He pulled her even closer as his fingers kneaded her soft skin. A moment of panic and fear gripped Meadow when she felt the rock-hard core of his manhood pressing against her stomach.

  Fleetingly, she remembered all the strict rules that governed the women of her tribe. She made a feeble attempt to pull away, but he ignored her efforts, and she quickly gave up the weak fight.

  Black Horse seemed vaguely aware of her mild protests. Tearing his lips away, then drawing in a ragged breath, he leaned back slightly. “Did you change your mind—?”

  “Never,” she interrupted without hesitation. She was vitally aware of the way his hands still clasped her buttocks, and even more aware of the way his manhood was no longer throbbing against her stomach. “But I can’t help being a little frightened,” she said in a raspy voice. Her mind whirled with indecision while her body sang with new and wanton yearnings.

  A tired sigh escaped from Black Horse. He did not release his tight hold on her. “I know, and I understand your feelings,” he admitted. “But if not for the Mountie, we would be married right now. And we should be living in our own homelands and carrying on the customs that have ruled our people since the beginning of time.” Black Horse’s voice was just a whisper as he added, “Nothing will ever be the same again for the Sioux. All that matters now is survival and this…” His head tilted down as his lips claimed hers in another demanding kiss.

  Black Horse’s words had almost the same meaning as the things White Buffalo had said to her before the wedding, and at this moment their reasoning had never made more sense. There might not be a future for the Sioux, and tomorrow might never come…and tonight was all that mattered.

  Without further delay, Meadow raised her arms up as Black Horse lifted her dress up over her head. A shiver claimed her as the chill of the autumn night brushed against her skin. Her breath caught in her throat as anticipation and nervousness made her entire body quiver. She crossed her arms over her breasts when she no longer had her dress to cover her. Black Horse reached out and pushed her arms back down to her sides. An intense anxiety bolted through Meadow as she stood completely exposed before him. Even in the near darkness, she could see the twinkle in his dark eyes as he closely surveyed her trembling body. The smile on his face suggested that he definitely liked what he saw.

  When he reached out to her again, she eagerly sought his arms. She felt her bare breasts flatten against his hard body, felt his swollen, hard manhood straining against his breechcloth again. There was no turning back.

  Black Horse let his hands roam freely over her soft skin. He could feel her tremble, and he could sense her complete surrender. An anxious quiver shot through him as he thought about the beautiful sight of her firm young body. The silken paleness of Meadow’s skin excited him more than he’d ever thought possible. He wanted to make her his woman now in every way, without another moment’s hesitation.

  In a single movement, Black Horse pulled his breechcloth away from his hips. He tossed it into the darkness of the night.

  The warmth of his bare manhood touched Meadow, and jumbled thoughts of the whisperings she had heard from the women of the tribe regarding the intimacy they shared with their husbands, combined with the realization of what he would soon be doing to her, made her knees grow weak. Not one coherent thought entered her head as she felt Black Horse begin to lower her down to the ground. She glimpsed the moon in the starlit sky overhead for just an instant before his kisses stole away the sight. She clung to him, unsure and frightened, yet too overwhelmed with desire to stop him.

  This magical night, the moon overhead and this man were her entire world at this moment.

  When his hips settled between her thighs, Meadow was vitally aware of the tip of his manhood pressing into her most private parts. She knew there would be pain; she had heard new wives talk about their first night with their husbands. With this thought, she tried to brace herself as he pressed farther inside her. His mouth covered hers again in a kiss that demanded her complete attention. Within the next instant his hips plunged down, and a searing pain ripped through her body. Her shocked cry was stolen away by his kiss, but the pain was worse than she had imagined.

  Black Horse remained inside her for a time, unmoving, as he let her adjust to the invasion. But just as quickly as it had exploded inside her, t
he searing pain began to subside. Then, slowly, he began to rock his hips up and down until her stiff body began to relax.

  Even though he was still kissing her, Meadow was only aware of the awakening sensations in her body. Now that the pain had faded away, she was experiencing an ache of a different nature. With each of his deep plunges she felt as if something uncontrollable was building up inside of her. She let her hips arch up to meet his. They began to move in unison, melding tightly together as if they were one.

  Black Horse’s kisses had ceased, and it felt to Meadow that his total concentration now was on driving himself down into her. Clinging to him as they moved together, Meadow lost touch with anything other than the overpowering passion she would never again be able to deny. She felt his movements grow more intense and held on tighter, clenching her teeth together to keep from crying out as ecstasy swept through her.

  Black Horse could not hold back any longer. Giving into the raging need that had climaxed to the highest summit, he released himself with abandonment. With a shudder, he began to relax against Meadow. He felt her grow limp in his embrace and sigh with contentment. For a moment, he was content, too.

  Tonight, as he had planned, he had made Meadow his woman. But now, as he had not planned, she had also awakened something in him. He knew for certain now that he would not be able to leave her behind when he left here—not even for a little while. But he would not give up on his war against the wasichu either. From this day forth, he decided, this woman would ride at his side. Then, he would know the true extent of her devotion to his people…and to him.

  Chapter Ten